In Touch With My Feminine Side-So What?

Posted: April 13, 2011 in About Me
Tags: , , ,

What constitutes a man being in touch with his feminine side?  How does a woman come to the conclusion that a male counterpart should be labeled under that category?  A category generally frowned upon by other males, who tend to live by the “real man’s man” code, resulting in probable embarrassment for the guy viewed as too effeminate.  Yet females, from personal experience, tend to think of it as an endearing quality (a turn-on even), resulting in said male, secretly –or not—being proud of his higher than normal estrogen levels.

I’ve been told more times than I can count, that I am far too in touch with my feminine side.  Is it a justified observation?  Yah, probably.  The only thing that leaves me baffled is, how does one really determine what’s overly feminine behavior for a guy?  Is it really odd and out of character for a male to take extra care of their appearance, for example?  Granted, maybe I do go the extra mile; I take an awful long time styling my hair, especially for someone with short hair to begin with; my mom, being an aesthetician, offers facials (they’re amazing) and waxing for those extra, out-of-place eyebrow hairs that are a nuisance – I gladly accept the free services.

I lost points on the masculinity, macho scale amongst friends because I am loyal to a hairstylist and frequent a salon instead of a barber-shop.  I’ve been the butt of jokes because I’m a fan of going to the mall for a shopping excursion.  Gasp!  Is it really so bad that I like shopping for nice things?  Is it a crime that somebody sans menstrual cycles, knows how to color co-ordinate attire?

The aforementioned not only allude to me being in touch with my she-part, but it also means I’m a “metro-sexual”;  A made up term, probably stemming from the whole “being in touch with your feminine side” notion –glorified by pretty male celebs–  that I won’t delve further into, for this post.

Besides the appearance related aspects, being in touch with my femininity also applies to my sensitivity and emotional scale – as if there were an actual scale used to measure such things.  Crying in shows, books and movies usually causes a riot of laughter from my male buddies…maybe tearing up during “Spider-Man” might have been unwarranted, and I rightfully deserved the mock treatment, but give me a break.

If I’m ever overly romantic or bragging about my girlfriend, it automatically means I’m “whipped” and have lost some sort of independence…Or maybe I just like treating her good?

How about this one: “You’re such a girl”, after putting the toilet seat down in its rightful spot.  So a true man has to be devoid of simple manners and etiquette now?

I’ve come to the conclusion that the expression, “being in touch with your feminine side” is grossly misused and misunderstood.  The archetypal male and female have been set in stone and are predisposed to behave in a certain fashion by those that are likely to type-cast.  It’s usually harmless and the comments don’t bug me at all, especially coming from close friends.  I love the way I am, and I don’t have a problem showing off my more, sensitive side.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m definitely a guy with masculine sensibilities (lots of them), but being a momma’s boy my whole life, I can definitely see the influences.  I’m just a big softie around the almost non-existent edges – I must be leaking testosterone from somewhere.

  1. pinkbambi13 says:

    It doesn’t sound like you are feminine, it sounds like you are a gentleman! Taking care of appearance, dressing in a pleasing manner, having an emotional depth and obviously being courteous to your girlfriend. Sounds like you are just nice!

  2. haha! Thanks pinkbambi13! and I know right? Why can’t it be just about me being an overall, nice guy? That’s why I think the whole idea of guys being one with their feminine side is largely a misunderstood topic. Just seems like people throw that label around for anyone that isn’t the slightest bit of a jerk or a complete macho-man type. lol

  3. momfog says:

    You put the toilet seat down and you love your mother. That’s not feminine, it’s polite and endearing. The word “macho” is absolutely terrible, by the way. I never think of anything good when I hear that word.

  4. midaevalmaiden says:

    Think about the far distant future. Someday youl be 10 happy years into a sucssesfull marrige or relationship. While those ‘macho’ guys will be lucky to keep a girl, and luckier still, to keep her faithfull if she exists. On that day ten years future while snuggling… youl be able to say, “look whos macho now!” Macho is only cool up to a point. Am I too coldhearted?

  5. rachelgrima says:

    I don’t like the terms ‘macho’ or even ‘feminine’! I think your actions would be adequately defined as polite, and I agree with all that has been said above.

  6. Kindred says:

    It is not about being macho or a mans man at all. The misconception many people have toward the term “feminine side” is that of a man acting as a women. Crying while watching spiderman “although halarious as monkeys throwing feces at eachother” is not seperating you at all from your male buddies. But showing how different we as a people are and not just some copy and paste person. Also being able to say this and admit you might not being a man’s man, there are others who respect you and never ask for you to change.

  7. Becky says:

    You put the toilet seat down? I’d like to invite you to Georgia to “teach” my husband how to do that. I think that is awesome!!!

  8. haha Becky! Well, I’ve never been to Georgia, so why not!? 😀

  9. Jonathan says:

    Hello, I am new to this so I dont know wht to put, From what I have read things like being nice to mum is not showing your feminine side-it is just being nice and showing that you love her. I am very nice to my mum, but I am not classified as being feminine nor am I classified feminine when I put the toilet set down when I have finished. I go to a hairdressers but that is not feminine, it might have been a long time ago but there are unisex now and so is waxing and getting yourselve waxed plus there is a difference between feminine and taking care of your appearence

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